A Dreamer

Funny people got funny dreams. Today is the last day of this year. I got a dream again that made me woke up with tears. Those who thought a man cannot be sissy plesae do not continue reading... I woke up at 8am something by an SMS, then slept again, there was when the dream began. I first met a girl who I like in high school long time ago, which surprised me since even I forgot about her totally. Well, but that's not the dream I wanted to talk about.

I met myself as a baby, lying there. Of course I was very cute and adorable. (People said you was adorable when you were young, implies that you will not be adorable when you grow up) I was taking care of myself, feeding myself and carrying myself. I enjoy the cuddle of my own baby on me very much. Interestingly, the baby can talk a little bit so we have a few lovely baby talk.

The thing is, I knew the dream is going to end when it's going to end. Suddenly I burst into tears. Feeling of leaving the dream? Maybe. However, I had this very strong feeling that I messed up my life, and also I am messing it up now. I was so adorable and 'well made', plus God gave me a lot of talents and blessings that I could enjoy. I was wasting those, making mistakes in my life always, being depressed and melancholic. When I woke up, I felt very sorry and I prayed that,

"Lord, I am sorry that I messed up the life you gave me. Please forgive me."

Another thing that I confirmed with this dream is, my nature is a family man. I think I truely enjoy holding a baby of my own with my wife. I hope that God gave me these attitudes and abilities, will not let me down by not giving me a family. I am re-watching the movie Abraham these days. The promise of God and the tracing of it by Abraham is very well done, together with the doubts and attack of the hope from time to time.

In the end, before Abraham led Isaac to the alter, Abraham said, "I will not disappoint my god again. There were times in the past when I believed that he had abandoned me. But, it was I.... who had abandoned him. And I will not disappoint him again."

Nothing so special but just a dream of a dreamer (豬嘜) at the end of the year....

Christmas Isn’t Christmas
lyrics & song: jimmy & carol owens

Christmas Isn’t Christmas
'till it happens in your heart,
Somewhere deep inside you
Is where Christmas really starts;

So give your heart to Jesus,
you'll discover when you do
That it’s Christmas
Really Christmas for you.

Jesus brings warmth like a winter fire,
A light like a candle's glow;
He's waiting now to come inside
As He did so long ago.

Jesus brings gifts of truth and life
And makes them bloom and grow.
So welcome Him with a song of joy
And when He comes you'll know ..... that ...

Christmas Isn’t Christmas
'till it happens in your heart,
Somewhere deep inside you
Is where Christmas really starts;

So give your heart to Jesus,
you'll discover when you do
That it’s Christmas
Really Christmas for you.

About Condemnation

When is the time when two people argue with the most extreme anger?

I will say, when they are emotionally overwhelmed, or, in another word, not base of facts and truth.

If I say that you are such a big fat pig, but actually you are underweight. Will you get angry? Or saying that you are ugly and disgusting, but actually you just won the beauty contest? Will you get angry? Of course not, truth denies false condemnation.

Next time, if you got condemned and you feel pissed, or unhappy and cannot accept it, probably it's because of

1. You do not realize that the condemnation is not true, or
2. The condemnation is true but you cannot accept it.

For us, i.e. Christians, we are condemned by Satan from time to time, or from other people used by Satan. If the first case happens, we'd better understand the truth and realize that it is the only way to set us free... well, how to know the truth? Know Jesus and study the Words. The other case, we are still sinners and what in the earth that we say that we are perfect? We should be glad that if someone rebuke us on something wrong about ourselves. We got our God to guide us and forgive us, if God is with us, who can against us? We should feel sad about our own sins, but we shouldn't be just stopping there. Again, know Jesus and study the Words. Follow our God the Father's will and seek the help of the Holy Spirit. That is the best we can do.

Next time, if you heart is upset by condemnation. Pray for the wisdom to know the truth. If it's really our own faults, pray for forgiveness and repent...

If I Believe in Revolution Theory


Taken from Reveredfun.com

Getting Stucked II

Interestingly, the first article of "Getting Stucked I" got a lot of responses, from comments, emails, msn, etc.... However, most responses asked me who are that 'one girl' that I was talking about... @_@ The main point of that is actually about the acts and my feeling of unfairness, not about who was that girl.. There are a few things I really really hate in my life. In a word, I really hate people who do what 'they see fits' in relationship. (Recently, I got a friend who broke up with his engaged girl friend and already engaged another girl within half a year.)

Although 'courtship' is not a life time commitment as marriage, I still believe there is some commitments ( or game rules, I use the word 'game' doesn't means treating it playfully, I just mean it's some rules like games of soccer, (American) football, tennis, etc. ) In a courtship, I think the rule is that the 'couple' should not consider others at the moment of dating. It sounds simple? See what I saw in real life, even from so called good Christians (or even 'spiritual' leaders)

I saw someone seducing others even he/she got a bf/gf.
I also saw someone seduce others who got bf/gf.
I saw people changing 'targets' six times in a year...
.... or approaching a few in the same time.

These are real stories and not imagination or exaggeration. In this age, loyalty to your bf/gf is a sin. Self interest is the first thing to be satisfied. Who makes me happy or who is better and I will hop on him/her and leave my current one alone, and sorry, I will not consider others' feeling.

Sorry that I don't mean I am a saint in relationships. I was also not doing good in the past. However, at least I consider others' feeling and refrain from doing anything that may hurt others at my very best. I just feel very unfair when I saw those who do not follow 'principles' or guidelines can be merried and married. I just completely feeling stupid for myself. Maybe I should be a jerk.

For those who are already in a relationship, I urge you to keep your mind clean and be kind to your bf/gf, even though the other party is extremely bad to you. Once you are in a relationship, having the thought of someone else maybe better is a poison, and it's not what God will like. Yes, there maybe some others can help you to glorify God more or help in your godiness. But, sorry, you are already in one relationship and thinking about another girl/boy is a betrayal to your current one, even it's JUST a relationship but not marriage. You may really decide to leave your current one, and WAIT for sometime and then go for the one who is 'better'. Changing your date immediately will hurt your old ones in a way that you cannot imagine (And you will not imagine or don't even care because you already WANT the other one) Once you had this kind of betrayal, I guess you may be subconciously afraid of that the same thing will fire back to you. Insecurity will definitely drive you into insane acts, like premarital sex, pre-mature marriage, etc (taken from books, 'intimate allies', '怎可以一生一世')

"In those days Israel had no king; everyone did as he saw fit." Judges 21:25

What is the time, Mr. Wolf?

Last few days, probably was the time I smiled and laughed most in this year. Our church held the children church camp and I was helping in the kindergarten classes. I thought it's easier because for preschoolers, we stayed in a room, doing crafts and singing songs.

I always enjoy my K1 kids, they are just tooooooooo cute. Luckily they were not my own kids or I would spoil them (although I always boast about how I am going to discipline my kids). This year, it's easier in the sense that we were in a room and did not need to run around. However, taking care of kindergarten kids was more difficult because... they could fly, jump, bite, fight, etc... you name it. The most enjoyable moment for me (later I will tell you when is the most enjoyable moment for the kids) was in the park. We enjoyed the nature on the boardwalk and looked for crabs and fishes along the way. At last, we were playing at the beach, and that's my dream of my life of building sand castle with kids, of course it's better if my future wife was there too...

Everything went well during the day with the kids, although my battery light is always blinking and my voice is lost already. All you need to do with kindergarten kids is to love them and encourage them. Praising some kids who behave very well like sitting very quietly will make others all listening to you. After six pm, they went home and did not stay overnight for the camp. I thought my day was over and I just took it easy for the night with my other kids in primary school.. The real stress came when I returned to my dorm, and discovered that two of my kids crying. One holding the cell phone and weeping, the other was crying outside. They were in primary one and it meant that this was the first time they stayed outside of their home.... in their life! Both of them wanted to go home. This was the second night and the first night I already did my best to put them to bed. When the kids wanted to go home, they WANTED to go home. Nothing could distract them. Finally, I let the kids in other room in and used my remaining voice to organised our secret club, 'stop laughing competition', charade, ... etc. until they really had fun and did not want to go home that much. You know what, then in the mist of crazying playing, some kids hit another one in his head and started crying.... and his mood just went down directly and refused to join any activities later on that night. ARRGGGH

Well, what I learned is, maybe I am like that too. Although I am quite contented in my life, there is ONE only thing I want, and I WANT it. Maybe God is telling me that I am like them also.

The highlight for the kids, is the game of 'what time is it, Mr. Wolf?' at the last day. They enjoyed it very much, and especialy when i got a tail (!!!) . The kids said that I am the most impressive wolf and some youth took the picture of me having the tails and hats on... and I think that's it for my life... noone will be interested in me anymore..... *sob* *sob*.

Well, at the end of the day, I still beleive that I will do it again next year.....

Zoom In, Slow Motion

Recently, I am playing a game called Viewtiful Joe 2. The interesting and unique feature of the game is that you can zoom in and do slow motion of certain stunts. In movies, directors usually use these tricks for the most touching or sentimental moments in a love story, or the coolest finishing blow in the final battle.

Imagine doing a commercial for the BIBLE and capture all these moments.

The first time Adam was made and opened his eyes. The first time he saw Eve. The first time Noah came out of the ark and saw the rainbow. When the red sea was seperated and the Israelite cerebrating and dancing. When Joshua first stepped into the promised land.

When Boaz married Ruth. The first time David looked back and saw Samuel, and later on David fell on his knees and begged for forgiveness after he sinned. When Esther gathered enough couraged and walked in to see the king.

When Jesus was born.

When John the Batpist was beheaded because of his faith. When Jesus saw the multitude and His heart is filled with passion.

When Jesus said "It's finished" on the cross.

When the women discovered the tomb of Jesus was empty and felled down to cry.

When Peter answered Jesus the third time "Lord, you know I love you."

Of course, the story didn't stopped, we still have Paul, Timoty, Stephen, Silas, Peter, etc. You name it.

And, it still goes on. When you are born. The first time you accepted Christ and came back to God's love, and any time that you knee down and pray...

Slow motion, zooming in.. and God smiles.

Getting Stucked I

Just want to write some stupid thing, this is not really like any of my other articles. I just want to grumble.

Life is full of situations when you got stucked. Things happened and then you cannot move in any directions.

When I was young, in high school I mean, I used to like a girl. Well, of course I was totally not attractive and stupid at that time. However, I still want to try and approach the girl. Too bad then the girl is not interested in me... However, what i discovered is because there are a guy flirting around. Impressively people know how to be more than friends, but less than bf/gf even when they are so young. Some people can just keep some ambigous friendships with many opposite sex at the same time. Of course, these guys are usually handsome and attractive and I am not.

These things didn't stop as I grew up... even once, my very own (ex) girl friend was seduced by such flirting guy who got a girl friend himself. Similarly, this guy had this habit of attracting EVERY girl. Especially that was the time in US, all people in our circles are away from home, just graduated from high school and emotionally not mature. I can see girls just fall for these flirting guys in no time.

Moreover, there was another guy, doing these 'attracting' girls thing, and destroying fellowships and creating problems.

They are all Christians.

And I can see , in various degrees, guys have these problem. Even they got a wife.

I cannot stop any of these, but I swear I will not be such flirting jerks.

However, there is where I got stuck. Whenever I feel I like some girls, these hatre for those flirting guys will stop me from anything..

Especially when I know the girl I like, is interested by a brother which sincere admiration. I'd rather hide myself and don't do anything. Well? Isn't it some kind of getting stucked? I was 'crossed' by others before and I do not want to cross anyone.

Faithfully
Written and performed by Eric and Leslie Ludy
(MP3 Download)

Tonight I saw a shooting star
Made me wonder where you are
For years I have been dreaming of you
And I wonder if you're thinking of me too

In this world of cheap romance
And love that only fades after the dance
They say that I'm a fool to wait for something more
How can I really love someone I've never seen before

But I have longed for true love every day that I have lived
And I know real love is all about learning how to give
So I pray that God will bring you to me
And I pray you'll find me waiting faithfully

CHORUS
Faithfully, I am yours
From now until forever
Faithfully, I will write
Write you a love song with my life
'Cause this kind of love's worth waiting for
No matter how long it takes I am yours

Tonight I saw two lovers kiss
Reminded me of my own lonliness
They say that I'm a fool to keep on praying for you
How's can I give up pleasure for a dream that won't come true

But I will keep believing that God still has a plan
And though I cannot see you now, I know that He can
And someday I will give you all of me
Until I find you, I'll be waiting faithfully

Son of Salmon

If you ask me which one is the most beautiful love story in the Bible, I will say it is the story of Boaz and Ruth (rather than Jacob and Rachael). When a lady of virtue met a gentleman of standing.

However, we cannot make such a story into a movie today. Why? Because it may not be popular. We did not see any "sexy" descriptions of Ruth saying that she had silky hair, smooth complexion, charming eyes, or Venus like figure. Also we did not see Boaz appeared as Brad Pitt or David Beckham. Of course, Boaz did not stand behind Ruth and open her arms on top of the windy trashing floor like the movie Titanic. At the end of the day, the failure of this story is because it is rated as G, not even MC16 or PG, namely, no sex, no violence, and not even a kiss.

Well, you can see this is an extraordinary ordinary story. Ruth has a caring heart, humble and diligent attitudes. Most of all, it is her trust in God. What I can learn from her is that she is willing to take up a burden for the good of others, a commitment for "whenever, whatever, whoever, for-ever". On one hand, this humility and obedience is extinguishing in this modern world, but, if Ruth can show such kind of virtues in that terrible chaotic period of time, why can't we do that also? Yes, we are incapable. However, there is no excuse for us for not doing so to those we love, especially for God by God's power. We always said that we are not 'ready' for certain commitment; however, if we said so and did not make a choice to take the risk and responsibility, there will be never a time to be ready. Because, only those who admit they are weak and insufficient will rely and trust on God.

When we pan our camera to Boaz, what can we say? He is rich, but this is not the valuable eligibility of Boaz. He is a kind man, gentle to his servant and others. Most importantly, again, he is a man of standing in God's eyes. He may not be a handsome or smart guy, but he definitely has a 'soft' heart to care for those who are in need and he did not look down on his servants. In the mist of all these, his integrity and submission to God popped up when he handle the redemption of Ruth. He likes Ruth, but he didn't violate any laws or God's commands for his own desire. I will doubt myself of what I will do when I was facing the princess I love, in the middle of the field when there is no body around. It is dark and the world is just me and her. At least I will have the impulse to hold her hands, or an "innocent" hug, or of course I want to kiss her. However, in that moment, Boaz had a clear conscience and did the right thing, namely, mentioning about the nearer kinsman-redeemer.

What an anti-climax! However, this is the time to show how to claim God's promises provided that we need to:

1. Fit into God's holy livings
2. consider others' good, not selfish thoughts
3. change our lives for eternal good

To follow these, I need to trust God. How much we trust God? It is not only a feeling of security, but also shown by our behaviors. For myself, I fear the future, so I dare not to plan. That's my weakness because I know my limitations. There was a period of time in my life that I dare not to get up from my bed because I was stressed by the many decisions I need to make in the office. However, I figured out that I did not trust God much and that caused my fear. I did not believe that God has a plan already and God's love is far more than I can imagine. If Ruth and Boaz is the beautiful love story, God is the director of this movie and the author who wrote the scripts with His gentle hands.

At the end of the day, what did we learn? Did we learn that we should find a husband who is rich and gentle? Or a wife who is hardworking and submissive? I guess these might be true but it is not the most important part. We should live a life of 'standing' and 'virtue' ourselves. Trust in God when we make commitments for others' good. Even in the situation that we will make 'die-hard' decisions which make us suffer loss. We should trust in His plan that when we submit to His will, He will take care of our plans.

At last, God is faithful to everyone, even Naomi is comforted. And the genealogy at the end of the book of Ruth rings the postlude. If I am going to name this piece of music, the name should be "My plan will go on".

Heroism

I guess, every boy has the feeling of being a hero in their hearts. Some people admire those 'heroic' heros, like Hercules, muscular and bravo.. Some will admire those who sacrifise such as Yue Fei (岳飛). Some heros are calm and intellectual, like Zhuge Liang (諸葛亮) who was talented but served his master until his last breath of his life. Some heros are romantic as well, such as Aragorn in the Lord of the Rings.

In Chinese, there are a few words related to "hero". Of course, the most common one is yīng xióng, which is known by the movie. Another word is xiá (俠), some English translation is the 'chivalrous warrior'. For me, it seems like the two terms have some differences in the meaning. I guess the former focuses on the archeivement that a yīng xióng has done. On the contrast, the later focuses on the virture of the person.

For being a "xiá", he can be a great "xiá" (or a small one?). In Jin Yung (金庸)'s Wu Xia (Martial Arts) novels. One of the most famous characters, Gwor Zhin (郭靖), said this before:

"為國為民,俠之大者"

It means "For the man has a heart for his people and his country, he is the great one among the heros". To be a great hero (大俠), he has to have a heart of sacrificial love for others, and virtues to persist. These are the great heros for full respects.

For us, "how should we then live?" Where and which are our country and our people? We are in God's kingdom. Our lives should also focus in "為國為民" (for our 'country', for our people) "For our people", it does not mean only for the people who are Christians already. We should also live for people who are not Christian yet. To show our 'virtues' that are transformed by our Saviour, and to persist and resist the evil of the world. Evil does not always come in horrible ways. Sometime evil sneaks in by an attravtive appearance and tempts us when we are unguarded. For a hero, he may not afraid of a dragon. However, if there is no dragon to kill and no princess to be rescued, or a friend to be protected, the hero may 'decay' by himself (That is the story of Caramon in Dragonlance series). This is one of the very handy tricks of Satan, instead of percecuting us, just give us a good life so we will be 'soften'.

For us, we should keep alert, and keep our eyes fixed on our ultimate Great Hero. The one who defeat evil by His own sacrificial love. For He is our King and our Lord, we should mimic Him and live for our Lord, our kingdom and our people.

My Chocobo

This is my 'truck' back in US, called 'DAIHOU 1'.
Remember that it serves very well, not only as my private car, but it is also the 'bus' for all others, and the 'truck' to help people to MOVE HOUSES! Although its colour is so old fashion, and also old (1990!), it still runs very well even i don't mentain it much :P . I guess it serves the Lord well also.. we just use it as the 'bus' to give people rides for sunday services and fellowships. Also remember I drove it from Illinois to North Carolina.

Chinese Quotations

橫眉冷對千夫指，俯首甘為孺子牛- 魯迅
鮑子曰：‘汝忘君（齊景公）之為儒子牛而折其齒乎？- 《左傳》
酒酣或化莊生蝶，飯飽甘為儒子牛 - 錢季重

Gdansk Poland

Yesterday, we went into the downtown of Gdansk to have a walk. Very comfortable and nice walk for historical buildings as well as rich culture of Polish people. Our conference place is in a 'hotel' (very crappy one) near to a very long nice beach. The sky is so blue here and everything is so calm and nice. We took a 40min bus ride to the downtown and visited interesting places. Of course, the most interesting thing is to observe people..

He's the Lord of the Sunshine

He's the Lord of the sunshine,
He's the Lord of the rain..
He's the Lord of the good times,
He's the Lord of the pain..
He's Lord of the mountains,
He's the Lord of the sea..
He's the Lord of the music,
the Lord of the children,
the Lord of..you and me..

Melody from: http://www.lifebpc.com/resources/Midis/TSMS/tsms013.mid

To be a True Atheist

Now, our society cannot live without science. We say a subject is a science if it uses 'scientific methods' based on proofs and experiments. On top of all these researches, we have the subject called 'engineering' and it is everywhere in our lives, civil engineering, mechanical engineering, computer engineering, chemical engineering.... you name it. So we believe that we live in a rational era that everything is proved. Then people fight back to God, it is not "scientific" to believe there is a Creator because we cannot see Him and cannot prove Him exists. People are evoluted from monkeys and fishes. If you keep your cats long enough, it can became another higher intellectual being.


I am not here to argue that if God exists or not. It just bugs me a lot when people emphasis the word "scientific". I sometime can see people are proud of being not religious but claiming themselves to be rational and scientific. Let's have a look what 'science' means. For my own opinion, i like this definition from a dictionary most:

"The observation, identification, description, experimental investigation, and theoretical explanation of phenomena."

Some other dictionaries have other meanings. (Although, I will say some are actually meaningless.) I will buy the above definition to be a quite correct and complete meaning of the word 'science'. In plain English, science means a 'systematic' way of observing some interesting phenomenon, then try to repeat some 'experiments'. If, what the experimental result shows it is consistent, then our observation probably is a 'truth', and we state it as a "theory".

My counter-attack is, who told us that if something happens ten times, then it is a truth? I can throw a dice and three in a row it shows '1'. Then I conclude that my dice, and all other dices in world, in the past and in the future, all shows '1'. Maybe this example is exaggerated. However, the 'scientific experimental proof' is the same thing (maybe they spend more money?) When we refer to 'proofs', it is either 'mathematical proof' or 'experimental proof'. For the later, there is not theory proved that doing experiments prove something. We are just believing this methodology works.


Moreover, there exists a chance that these experiments give wrong interpretation. There was a survey in Africa showing that the boys in the age of 6-10 have higher I.Q. if their feet are larger. Does it tell us that bigger feet makes people more clever? (Or some part of our brains can grow in the feet?) More deeper investigation tell us the fact is just that some boys grow up and develop faster, and that's why they have higher I.Q. Experimental results and surveys are not that as accurate as we thought and sometimes misleading... I do not mean these are wrong, but just feel very sad for people who do not really understand what 'scientific' means and just abuse it and say 'Christianity' is not scientific. I think if you ask me, and many other Christians, they can tell you that our reformed lives are the biggest experiment showing that God exists.

There are still a few things that bug me when people do not understand science. A lot of time, scientists are 'guessing' then do some experiments to prove they are right. Just like molecular model. By all means, 'modeling' means 'guessing', we do not know the real configuration or fact, so we come up with some ideas to 'approximate' or 'guess' the real one. For example, noone has ever see what a molecule is really like, don't even talk about electrons or ions. We just guess what they maybe, and teach all of these to our primary and secondary school kids. When they grow up, they think all of these are truth. I don't mean they are not wrong (nor right), these all 'models' are just unfalsifiable.


The other thing i may want to say is about mathematics. I guess a lot of people treat maths as some 'holy' truth. Anything that is proved mathematically cannot be wrong, and 'scientific'. Do you know that maths is an ART SUBJECT? Why? it does not have any experiment, so we cannot say it is a science. Also, although some mathematics theory are proven, but when you traced up the proofs, they all start with 'definitions'. Have anyone prove that -1 times -1 is +1? That is defined but not proven. Maybe it can be still proved, but the proof will still be based on definitions. What I mean is, we are just believing some ancient mathematicians of what they said, but not some indestructible truth. They are not true, but just unfalsifiable.

I called the above beliefs. Using science and maths are some kind of beliefs that is not as 'solid' and 'perfect' as we thought. Although Albert Einstein is not exactly a Christian, but he said this before:

"Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind."

I agree with Calvin (not the one who starts Calvinism, but the one with his tiger friend Hobbs) that mathematic is a religion, thus science is also a religion. If we just treat the word 'religion' is accepting something as our beliefs without proofs of every root. To be a true atheist, don't use maths, don't believe that things are made of molecules (molecular modeling means 'we guess how the molecules look like', no one 'see' any molecules or ions or electrons), don't drive the car because it is not proven.

When I believed in God, there was one idea that struck me. When I am sick, I believe the doctor and take the pills he gives. No one proved those pills will work. Even they works on some other people, they may not work on me. What in earth that I should trust those pills can heal me? but not making me worse? We all have the illness called 'sin', and only God can heal. If we never believe God can cure, we will never be healed.

One year again...

Just went to the hospital this morning, did a surgery and removed my lump in my back. My mom has been nagging me of this for years and finally she won. About a finger size of meat (pork?!) is cut out and the wound is not hurting at all. Is it that I am too old and cannot sense it anymore? Tomorrow is my birthday again. Reflecting about this year.... Is there anything meaningful this year?

This year I changed to a new church, started teaching kindergarden kids again, joined a fun disciple group, became a BSF leader, removed my lump (does that count as some archeivement?), went to Cambodia for a mission trip, got a few papers published, graduated one master student, picked up tennis, and danced Salsa again.... But, I think the biggest thing this year should be the conversion of my mom after all these years of prayer ( > 14 yrs! ) A big relief. Well, now i can take it a little bit easier. First, my sister became a Christian and baptised, then my mom. Now my father is outnumbered, muhahahhaaha.

However, for my own very self... didn't seem much is done.

..... 厠水榴槤

Fire Breath!

I like spicy food. There is one good one in China town here. One of my students brought me there when he graduated. (Of course I like the Chinese wine there... please don't let our BSF TL know.. ) The alcohol mixed with the insane hot food just dance inside my mouth. Of course, we can do the same thing with Korean food and their soju, or Sake with Wasabi. However, it's still the Chinese ones more powerful. I am very happy that I can take the "hot" food. >_< There is a saying in Chinese, but I don't know which version is the right one, maybe someone can help me. Is it:

四川人不怕辣，湖南人怕不辣，贵州人辣不怕 ? or
湖南人不怕辣，贵州人辣不怕，四川人怕不辣 ? or
江西人不怕辣，四川人辣不怕，湖南人怕不辣 ? or
四川人不怕辣，湖南人辣不怕，江西人怕不辣 ....?

Anyway, I like the dish "夫妻肺片" most. I feel like I got nine fingers now. (?) Probably I will be attracted to someone who can cook rather than someone who is pretty :P

Open? Or Open Not?

I seldom watch TV. However, my mom and grandma are here for a week, so the TV is on. There was a show called "Crossfire". This is a forum type of show that invited some people and discussed some interesting topics. And they were talking about "Should Singapore be more open?"

The show started with the 'history' of the evolution of this Singapore "opening". First we allowed gambling, then X-rated movies, topless shows, bar dancing, etc ... Finally, this "integrated resort" with casino is allowed. Then they started to argue if we should be more open.

It amazed me how the people justified the need for 'sex industry'. They talked as if it is abnormal if we do not allow people to 'buy sex'. Some of them gave some reasons to justify:

1. There is no right or wrong, it is just "relatively speaking". We found those shows/prostitudes wrong because we found it strange and rare, in chinese "少見多怪". All these are not wrong and "relatively right" if we had them everyday. (Maybe, one day, stabbing his own father to death or sleeping with his own mother will be relatively not wrong also if everyone does that.)
2. It's a trend of the world that we cannot avoid, otherwise we cannot bring our offsprings to the next stage of human civilization. ( Well... the glorious Roman Empire and some other western cultures, I will include the current USA in my list, fell and all started with social, especially sexual, decay. Maybe 'decline of a country' is also a trend that we cannot avoid.)
3. Showing of the body is art. There is no boundary of art and we cannot put a frame on it by saying those are not art but erotic. ( No wonder Marcel Duchamp can be famous. Next time, my "nose blew" tissue can be put into a museum and I will name it "Wanton".)
4. If we got those what we wanted, actually people maybe satisfied and they might even don't want them anymore.

Quoating Joshua Harris in his book of "Not even a hint", he said "Lust is always an unholy desire for the forbidden. But though lust longs for an object or a person, ultimately this object is not its prize; its goal is the very act of desiring. The result is that lust can never be quenched. As soon as the object of lust is attained, lust wants something more."

What People think about 'lust' nowadays?

People don't call it 'lust', they call it 'pleasure'. John Piper is not a mathematician but he gave this formula: 'Lust is a sexual desire minus honor and holiness." For me, "lust is liking without the corresponding commitment". The modern meaning of 'love' is just 'liking' or 'fondness', it is just a feeling and a desire, but not giving and commitments. That's why we can 'buy sex'.

How Should We Then Live? ( This is a good book to read!)

Just imagine our future, actually just look at the States or Europe. The children lost their virginity at the age of 14, or even earlier, or even NOT with the opposite sex. Abortion is not an option anymore because there are so many underaged mothers. (Even they gave birth to the baby, unhappy families are the results and caused social break down.) Sexual illness, AIDS, unproductive industry are all around. And we should respect people who are homosexual or divorced (...a few times) Kids left home at the age of 18 in order to get their own place because their parents cannot control them anymore... One day your SON came back and bring you his BOYFRIEND. Anymore? I cannot put all because there are even more terrible ones. These are real and these are happening in the society and these are reality!

Want all these? Singapore is moving towards this direction and this "trend". Someone may say, 'not that serious ma! We are far away from that.'. Chinese we say "冰封三尺,非一日之寒" (The ice with three feet thickness is not only frozen in one day.)

That's the payoff of lust - "a continual lust for more". Joshua Harris

Why God Created Women for Men?

In the beginning of the creation, "The LORD God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.' " (Genesis 2:18)

So, does it mean women are 'subordinates' of men?

No. You know why women are the 'helpers'?

Because...

Men really need some help!

The apes are loose again!!!

Oh no... The game Ape Escape 3 is here!!!!
I enjoyed the AE2 so much! A game of fun without any blood and fighting but got very cute storyline and graphics... In last game, there were Ape Skywalker and Ape Solo to catch.. Although I only got a Jap version now, it's so fun...

The evil guy is releasing all the monkeys and putting hats with red and blue lights on.. to control them. Our task is to use a net to catch them. Of course the monkeys will fight back, by throwing banana skin to make us slipped. On top of this 'catch you if you can', the monkeys will make faces and pat their butts to insult you. Also some of the female monkeys will pretend to be very innocent and harmless, try to make you to spare them.

For those who like MSG3, look at this cool MESAL GEAR SOLID!

Love is a Choice

Life is not more than..

To love, to be loved, to hurt and to be hurt.

We can only love others, and try our best of not hurting others..
but, we cannot make others to love us, or stop others from hurting us.

However, we all have a choice, to choose who we love. Also, to choose not to revenge when others hurt us. Love is interesting in a way that it is not only about feeling. If we love someone because of he/she is beautiful, or smart, or gentle, and so these make us feel good... this is NOT love.. it is just 'liking someone'. To love is to make a willful choice to give regardless of what the person is. Same thing for hurting people, we pay attention from time to time to avoid unnecessary damage to others, especially those we love. Sadly, many people will only love those who make them happy, and hurt others "at will"...

If it's not God, I won't even give it a try to love.

We are not cute, we are not lovely, we are not even pleasant. We sinned, we made God angry and sad.

I always compare us, the human race, as a toothbrush. We are like a toothbrush which can think. One day, the toothpaste told us, if we jump into the toilet, we will become a human! Then we will become the creator of toothbrush. So we stupidly jumped in. WHO WANTS TO USE A TOOTHBRUSH AGAIN AFTER PICKING IT OUT FROM THE TOILET? Well, of course everyone will just dump this stupid toothbrush into the trash and buy a new one, or rather just use a finger to brush the teeth.

Can you imagine someone die for the toothbrush?! Use his own blood to clean it? And make himself insulted and humiliated so other people also know that this toothbrush is still useful? and beloved?

If someone really does this, what can we say? "How can it be?"

God chose to die for us, He even planned it before the world is created.

Quotations (Kate & Leopold):

Leopold asks, "Is this what you do at work, Kate? Research methods to deceive people? Refine lies until they resemble truth? It's no wonder you dread your work week."

She shakes her head in disbelief and begins to walk away.

Leopold continues, "What's happened to the world? You have every convenience, every comfort, yet no time for integrity."

"As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. "

Proverbs 27:17

I don't think the iron will feel good when it's being sharpened. There will be friction, heat, rubbing, tearing off, breaking....We are not always happy, we are not just a social group for fun.And unhappy things WILL happen, and will DEFINITLY happen. We are all sinners, i mean it for myself. We still have something imperfect inourselves. Unless we are not sharing our lives with each other, not deep enoughto touch each others' weak points, not burdened enough to share others'sorrow and sadness, only keep on a superficial and shallow relationship,then we will have no conflict, no sharing, we can always joke aroundand be free and happy.

But, we are not like that. We are in a Christian group for lives sharing, not only for fun. We share our laughter , and we share our problem.We are brothers and sisters in Christ, and it means, "one day brothersand sisters, forever brothers and sisters", it means eternally. That's mybelief. "Bros and sis" are not just some jargons.I remember one of my bros said it before, if Jesus said "only the sick needs the doctor", then the church is the big hospital. Bible said it very clearly:Can anyone say he/she got nothing wrong at all? Even it happens to have nothing wrong, how many times did Jesus told usto forgive each other?

If it's such a easy thing to forgive, Jesus does not need to die.