Deception

I watched an interesting video clip online. It was a short talk between David Zinczenko editor-in-chief of Men's health magazine and Kate White, editor-in-chief of Cosmopolitan. David did a research of what men look for in a women and here is the list, in the order of importance:

  1. Faithfulness
  2. Intelligence
  3. Beauty
  4. Honesty
  5. Good in bed
On the contrast, this is the research of what women think men look for in women:
  1. Beauty
  2. Confidence
  3. Good in bed
  4. Allure
  5. faithfulness & honesty
The first reaction of Kate was questioning the results from guys were only that "they just said what they were supposed to say", my interpretation is of her hidden word is... "hypocritical".

Guys, what say you?

The host said, "If you are 25, you may want a 'hot chick', but if you are 35, you really realize what is important." Guys are not that dumb... although there are some....

I would say a lot of young guys may really go for looks. Mature guys don't.

According to David,
  • %90 of men rate having wives as soulmate over amazing sex.
  • %72 honesty > looks
David said, "no use to have a beautiful orchid if always worrying someone is picking it up"
  • %60 beautiful face > beautiful body
Kate immediate protested that guys look for "curves". (That's why so many slimming program out there for women.) However, David said, "it's not the face, it's the eyes." I totally agree, the eyes of a woman reflects herself. Not only physically, but also their emotion, inner self. You can tell a lot from the eyes if a person is living in fear, ignorance, or wise, kind, etc. from the eyes.

Interestingly, Kate insisted in thoughts like, "guys like beauty", and also like women to be "allure", "mystery", and "excitement of women which surprise guys everyday".

I think she is not reflecting the reality, she is trying to change the reality.

For the first second, yes, a beautiful woman will catch a guy's sight, but for not more than 5 min, i.e., not for the life long time as a wife. "Beauty is fleeting"

For one night stand, maybe "allure" and "mystery" hook guys, but you cannot be mysterious for a life long commitment.

Excitement everyday? First, how can that be possible?! Even so, the guy may die from a heart attack one day. Excitement only excites people when it gets heavier and heavier.

Yes, for ignorant guys, they look for appearance. For mature guys, let's get real.

I used to serve in youth ministries and I told the youth. "How you attract is what you get." You dress as half-naked, you attract lusty guys. You talk wisely, you attract mature guys. As Christians, you live your daily life with a good relationship with God, you attract godly men. This is a matter of choice, you cannot attract a guy who got everything good things. There were a saying,

If a guy is handsome, usually he is a playboy.
If a guy is rich, usually he is not faithful.
If a guy is nice, usually he is already married.
If a guy is handsome, rich, and nice, but he is also faithful, not a playboy and not married....

.... probably he is gay.

Ladies, please wake up, don't read Cosmopolitan (or whatsoever magazines) anymore. Guys likewise, stop reading those magazines that give you a false image of the other sex and make you more dumb.

P.S. A final word... guys or girls, we usually don't want to grow up. So we stay at the stage of fantasy. That's why the commercials are so 'fantastic'. Wake up! You are living in a real world.
P.P.S. That is why I always sigh and quote two old Chinese verses:
  1. 千里馬常有,而伯樂不常有
  2. 路遙知馬力,日久見人心
(Interestingly they are all about horses.)

P.P.S What is your list?

2 comments:

Nana said...

My list? Hmm.. well, he has to be a man who fears the Lord.

That's it.

Unknown said...

This is what I have been pray for:
1) Love God more than anything in the world;
2) Love me more than anything else in the world;
3) Love my family members and friends and of course, also his family and friends;
4) Gentle, humble, diligent, wise, humorous although I am slow at appreciating humor, also forgiving because I am good at flaring ppl's anger;
5) share the same life direction - willing to pour out his life for the Lord without reservation.